We’ve had a bit of craziness swirling around us recently, but my little family, the three of us, is my safe place. The moment that Alain’s visa was approved my years of having an almost always anxious heart melted into peace. Each day since, I am falling more and more in love with my husband and with our son. The joy it is for me to be called his mom is beyond my dreams. When he says it out loud, I can hardly believe that this is my life.
There have been a few bumps in our first months together (some days of tears and being defeated), but lately we have hit a bit of a stride. Let me tell you (again!), this boy is incredible. Every day, he makes me smile. As we learn each other, the laughs are getting better and better. With one-on-one help with his studies, he is blossoming. Just today he told me that before, when he saw large problems in math, he would just quit. It was too difficult for him. Now, he is making A’s on algebra tests. Beyond the day to day happenings, the things that he is teaching us are so beautiful, so much more than algebra and science.
Lesson 1: God hears your prayers.
We pray together as a family before we go to bed every night. Alain prayed when he was in Rwanda. When asked about his visa, his answer is always the same. He knew that he would get it. The beauty of his prayers is not so much in the eloquence, but in the huge faith, the complete confidence. A couple of weeks ago, one of his pigeons, his favorite baby pigeon, was really sick. Barely walking and the parents stopped feeding it. Alain would not give up on it. We (everyone but Alain) thought that is was a hopeless cause. He started feeding it himself, kept it safe from the others, and did his own version of physical therapy. And he prayed. He prayed that God would heal his pigeon. Now, that pigeon, Kawa, (coffee in Kinyarwanda) is walking, flying, fighting with the others and his parents started to feed it again. Every time I see that bird I am reminded what a little faith can do in a hopeless situation. His prayers are simple, full of gratitude and overflowing with real, child-like faith.
Lesson 2: Your circumstances (past or present) cannot take your joy unless you let them.
This boy has joy. Not a fake polite smile, but deep down in your heart joy. His past, what he has shared with us so far, has some really dark times. Things that even as I type this, I am wrestling with my mind not to think of them because the thought alone pains my heart. He could so easily dwell in that past (I know I choose to dwell in mine more than I should), but he doesn’t. He moves on. He looks forward. He smiles. It is a lesson that I need to learn and he teaches it so beautifully.
The facts of our situation, bringing a teenage boy, only half our age, who we spent fewer than 8 hours with, from a far away to live with us sounds crazy. Downright certifiable. I can’t explain it. Several times a day I wonder how exactly it happened. But I cannot fathom loving a child more than I love Alain. Since I was a little girl, I have been dreaming of becoming a mother. In my dreams it was the conventional way, pregnant and in the hospital. I am so humbled and overwhelmed that God had such a different path for Chris and I. Two years ago, I thought that path would lead straight to a baby girl from Ethiopia and I thought that was big. Through this unexpected detour, I am learning in a whole new way that God’s got this life of mine under control. I have nothing to fret about. His timing is perfect. I am so content with now and so excited for the future, wherever it may take us.
“As we give, we find that ‘sacrifice brings forth the blessings of heaven’ and in the end, we learn that it was no sacrifice at all.” -Spencer W. Kimball
-Jenn
by Jenn
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